


Round Trip For One

by Rasborealis



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: A Kneazle, Drarropoly 2.0 - A Drarry Game/Fest, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Friends to Lovers, Goblins, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Humor, Knitting, M/M, Nosy Bystanders, Oblivious Harry Potter, Old Ladies, Pining Draco Malfoy, Post-Hogwarts, Rain, Roommates, Squibs, The Knight Bus (Harry Potter)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-09
Updated: 2020-01-09
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:13:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,223
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22186906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rasborealis/pseuds/Rasborealis
Summary: Harry's flatmate has a date, and for some reason, Harry's well-meant objections are falling on deaf ears.It takes a drastic intervention on a violently purple triple-decker bus to make him understand.
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter
Comments: 20
Kudos: 359
Collections: Drarropoly 2.0 - A Drarry Game/Fest





	Round Trip For One

**Author's Note:**

> Etalice is seriously worth her weight in gold, just for the record.

Harry had simply meant to take a walk to clear his head. The fresh air, the steady, repetitive movement of his steps, and the slowly changing surroundings usually gave him the space he needed to think things through rationally – channel his inner Hermione, as it were. But after he slammed the door, ready to go stalking off into the night, he stepped right into a torrential downpour, and the sound of thunder growled overhead as the wind tore at his hair.

How appropriate.

Harry reflexively yanked his wand up to cast a spell and then realized there was nothing powerful enough to keep him either dry or warm – not when the wind was so strong that the rain was pelting damn near sideways, and the sheer amount of what was coming down could have filled a small ocean. The curb was already overflowing.

With a _bang!_ , a violently purple triple-decker bus appeared in front of him and came to a screeching halt.

_Oh._

Harry stared dumbly at his wand, which he’d forgotten to lower, and then back at the bus. He gave a mental shrug.

_Sure, why not._

The conductor of the bus stepped out, and of course it was no longer Stan Shunpike. “Hello,” said the girl with turquoise hair who wore a floaty white dress that wouldn’t have looked out of place on Luna Lovegood. When Harry didn’t respond, she tilted her head. “Are you alright? You look…confused.”

“Oh. Yes, no, I’m fine. Well, I’m not _fine_ , exactly, but I think that getting away from my flat will help, and, er, well, I.” He faltered, because the girl flicked her head up to the sky and Harry realized he was standing there like a bloody idiot, getting rained on. “I’ll…I’ll just get on, shall I?”

“Yes,” she said, “I think that would be best. What’s your name?”

“Har –” he started as she stepped aside to let him on. “Er, Henry.”

“Alright then, _Henry,_ welcome aboard.”

The driver of the Knight Bus was different too, he saw, an older woman with wild, curly hair that surrounded her face like a cloud. She wore a fuzzy orange coat and kept staring straight ahead but acknowledged him with a nod.

“Can I just…do a round trip?” Harry asked, digging in his pocket, where he found an interesting variety of coins, both muggle and wizarding. There were even two shiny Euros. He had no idea how or where he might have acquired them.

“Sure, love,” was the answer, and a moment later he held a ticket in his hand.

“My name’s Sky,” said the turquoise-haired girl and held up a fluffy towel. “Hold still.” She carefully dried his face and then wrapped the towel around Harry’s shoulders.

“Thanks,” he said and was about to turn away when he realized she’d left his fringe plastered to his forehead. A moment later, he received a wink.

The bus was quite empty. A variety of chairs were arranged in a rough U-shape on the lowest level, and there appeared to be only four other passengers – a big goblin, a smaller one, and two little old ladies who were both knitting. They seemed quite competitive, if the looks they gave each other were any indication.

Harry chose an armchair that was blue and squashy. He sank into it so far that he thought he might never be able to find his way back out of it. The rain drummed against the roof and sides of the bus quite loudly, and suddenly, he felt quite cozy.

“Dearie me, is it raining?” asked one of the two little old ladies, pausing in her knitting to peer at him nearsightedly.

“Er, yes,” said Harry.

“Honestly, Ermintrude, the storm is dreadfully loud,” said the other old lady. “Surely your hearing hasn’t gotten quite that bad?”

Ermintrude scowled. “Don’t, Philomena, or we can start having a nice chat about _your_ eyesight.”

Philomena’s mouth fell open. “You wouldn’t!”

“Try me,” said Ermintrude with a voice like ice.

“And here I am knitting you a jumper,” said Philomena and looked down at the woolly mint-green project she held in her hands.

“Only because I decided to knit you a vest, and your pride got in the way of you accepting it gracefully.” Ermintrude waved her own knitting project, pale pink and fuzzy, in illustration.

There was a hissing sound. Harry jumped a bit when he saw a grumpy-looking Kneazle suddenly sitting on the armrest of his chair.

“You two are upsetting Evadne,” said the bigger goblin, who was wearing a flower-print tunic. “Stop it.”

“Oh, I’m sure Evadne is just fine,” said Ermintrude. She stretched out a hand toward the Kneazle, who hissed again. “Excuse you,” Ermintrude huffed.

“Evadne is an interesting name for a Kneazle,” said Harry. “I like it.”

“Thanks,” said Sky the conductor. “She seems to like it well enough so far.”

“So far?” Harry asked as the rapid clicking and clacking of knitting needles started back up.

“She only joined us a few days ago. We thought she just wanted a warm, dry spot to take a nap and maybe a full belly, but she seems to have appointed herself Hospitality Manager and decided to work for her keep.”

“Mrow,” Evadne confirmed. Her slightly moist nose tickled Harry as she touched it gently to the skin below his jaw. She sneezed.

“Bless you,” everyone in the bus, save Harry, chorused. The goblin child was especially enthusiastic about it. Evadne, meanwhile, pawed at the back of Harry’s armchair.

“Oh, right,” said Sky, and came over to drape the knitted blanket that had been lying there over Harry’s lap and tuck him in. “See?”

“I do,” Harry confirmed. “Hey, how come you’re not using your wand?”

“I don’t have one, I’m a Squib,” Sky said cheerfully.

“Bit rude, to just ask like that,” Ermintrude opined and looked at Harry with mild disapproval.

Sky shrugged. “I don’t mind. Everyone always expects me to be ashamed of it. But it’s fine, really. I can still experience all of this magic.” She gestured at the bus in general. “I think not being able to use it makes me appreciate it even more. So many wizards end up taking it for granted.”

Evadne regarded Harry again, twitched her tail twice, and then stalked off, apparently satisfied. He found the blanket pleasantly warm and was thankful Evadne had made sure he had one.

“That’s a very good point,” he said to Sky. “And a good attitude. We do need to stop treating Squibs as though they’re a dirty secret, as a society.”

“Yes,” Sky said. “But don’t ask me how to go about doing that, I just work on a bus. If you don’t mind, I have a question for you now though. How come you’re wanting a round trip? Not very many people like to ride the Knight Bus for the fun of it, oddly enough.”

“Ah.” Harry sighed. “It’s complicated. I won’t bore you with it.”

The two old ladies exchanged looks.

“We’re short on entertainment,” Philomena said eagerly.

“Er, well…I suppose.” Harry frowned. “There was a, a disagreement with my flatmate. I needed to clear my head.”

“I see,” said Ermintrude. “Well, don’t leave us hanging, what was the disagreement about?”

“Was there yelling?” Philomena asked. “Broken dishes? Did anyone bleed?”

“No, nothing like that.” Harry frowned and looked out of the raindrop-covered window to his right. There was nothing but darkness beyond his reflection. “It seems a bit ridiculous now.”

“It probably is,” said Philomena. “That just makes me want to know it more.”

Harry wasn’t sure what to think about anyone wanting to know about his fight with Draco for the entertainment value. “It was about…he’s going on a date later tonight.”

“Oh!” said Sky. “And you’re secretly in love with him, so you’re hurt and upset.”

“What? No!”

“Are you sure?” asked Philomena. “Personally, I think that would be very exciting.”

“Don’t tell the boy you’d like it if he was hurt and upset,” Ermintrude chided.

“I mean the part about him being secretly in love, you old bat!”

“That _is_ true. Are you sure you aren’t secretly in love, young man?” she asked.

“I am _not,”_ Harry said with emphasis. “Honestly, no.”

“Oh,” Sky said, sounding disappointed.

“I used to hate him, actually,” Harry admitted. He wasn’t sure why he was sharing all of this; he usually detested strangers knowing his personal business. It felt oddly nice though, being able to let it all out. “And he simply loathed me. But over the past couple of years, we managed to mend fences. We were both tired of all the negativity. We started meeting up for coffee every once in a while, just to talk, and we actually got on quite well. Then he told me he was looking for a new place to live, and my old flatmate moved out because Hogwarts offered him a teaching position, so it all worked out quite well.

“Well it can’t have, if you’re sitting here all hurt and upset and heartbroken,” said Philomena.

“Honestly.” Ermintrude shook her head. “Maybe you’re the one who is getting to be hard of hearing, my dear.”

Philomena huffed. Her needles clacked faster.

Somewhere toward the back of the bus, Evadne sneezed. “Bless you!” everyone called out.

“The guy he’s going on a date with…it’s just not a good idea,” Harry tried to explain.

“Why?” Sky asked with a frown.

“His name’s Leroy –”

“Leroy,” said Ermintrude, “horrible name. I see your point.”

“You’re one to talk,” said Philomena.

Ermintrude interrupted her knitting just long enough to make a very rude gesture that Harry had never seen an older woman make. “I’m being supportive. Can’t you see he needs us to be supportive?”

“I think Leroy is a ridiculous name,” the bigger goblin in the flower-print tunic joined the conversation. “Of course, most human names are.”

The little goblin started to say something and was promptly shushed. “English, Bug. You need to practice if you ever want the wizards to show you the slightest bit of respect.”

The little goblin, Bug, nodded in very serious fashion and then whispered loudly, “Is my name horrible, mama?”

“Don’t be silly, of course it isn’t. It’s a good, strong goblin name.”

“Your name’s Bug?” Harry asked to make sure he’d heard it right. The goblin child promptly hid his face in his mother’s flowery tunic.

“It’s Buglirg,” said the mother. “But I think nicknames are acceptable for little ones, so we call him Bug. I’m Graglor.”

“It’s nice to meet you both,” said Harry. “I’m Har-Henry.”

“Buglirg,” said Ermintrude. “That’s a much better name than Leroy.”

“Right, yes, Leroy.” Harry had nearly forgotten. “His name isn’t actually the problem, it’s…everything else.”

“He must be a very unpleasant young man,” said Philomena.

“Yes,” Harry agreed emphatically. “So obviously, I have to stop my flatmate from going out with him, see?”

“What’s unpleasant about him?” asked Ermintrude. “Do his feet smell?”

“Er, no.”

“Does he chew with his mouth open?” asked Philomena.

“No, not that.”

“Is he emotionally abusive?” Sky asked with concern.

“I don’t think so, he just –”

“Do you think he steals goblin treasures, mama?” Bug whispered very loudly.

“No, no, all your treasures are safe,” Harry assured him.

“Well that’s good to hear,” said Graglor. “But then what’s the problem with this Leroy?”

“Well, he, he…he sort of…”

“Yes?” Sky asked, leaning toward him with wide, concerned eyes.

“I guess he’s not…horrible as such.”

“Oh,” everyone said at once, disappointedly. Then, “Bless you!” when Evadne sneezed once more as she came wandering back to them.

“Mrow,” Evadne opined. She jumped back onto Harry’s armrest and gave him a piercing stare. Harry felt very ganged up on.

“He’s really wrong for Draco though!” he insisted.

“Oh?” asked Graglor. “Is he planning to take advantage of this Draco? Steal his most precious jewelry? Collapse the ceiling of his ore mine, possibly?”

Harry gave her a blank stare. “His…ore mine.”

Graglor rolled her eyes. “Humans,” she said. “No sense of priorities.”

“Humans,” Bug agreed and rolled his eyes as well.

“Anyway, no, it’s not the jewelry or the ore or anything. Draco just needs someone devoted, you know. Someone who adores him, who loves flying as much as he does, who will make him breakfast in the mornings and give him backrubs when he’s had a long day. Someone who can make him laugh, you know? That’s important.”

Everyone was silent and looked at each other. Evadne headbutted Harry’s forearm and he started scratching her behind the ears absent-mindedly. “What?”

“How difficult is it to make your flatmate laugh?” asked Sky. “I mean, can _you_ make him laugh?”

“Yes, of course,” Harry said. “Not always on purpose, but he does laugh a lot.”

“Excellent, excellent,” said Philomena. “ _Someone_ should make him laugh. Have you given him backrubs, picked up the slack instead of this Leroy? Maybe made breakfast?”

“Yes,” Harry said. “I make breakfast all the time. Why does that matter?”

“Do you love flying as much as he does?” Ermintrude asked pointedly.

Something began to dawn on Harry. “Yes?” he said and ducked his head.

Everyone was quiet again and looked at him. The rain continued to drum monotonously against the windows.

“Do you adore him?” Sky asked gently.

Harry suddenly found it hard to breathe. He struggled out of his chair. “Stop! Stop the bus!” he yelled. “I need to go back! I need to tell Draco that I, er…”

“That you’re secretly in love with him and that you’re hurt and upset,” Sky helped him along.

“Yes! Yes, that. Have we stopped?” He looked around wildly.

“We never moved, love,” the bus driver shouted back. “You never said where it was you wanted to go.”

“Round trip,” Harry protested as he made his way up front. “I said round trip!”

“That only means that you go back to where you started,” Sky pointed out, “and that’s what you’re doing.”

“Thank you,” Harry said. “Thank you so much. I can’t tell you…I’d never have figured it out on my own!”

“We just want to see you happy, dearie,” said Ermintrude.

“Invite us to the wedding,” Philomena demanded.

“Wedding!” Harry yelped.

“Isn’t that what you wizards do?” asked Graglor. “Monogamous shackles?”

“Yes,” Sky confirmed. “Very romantic shackles though. Good luck, Harry! Er, Henry! Come back soon and bring Draco along, will you?”

Harry leapt off the bus, reached his front door in three steps and burst through it with more force than he’d planned. It crashed against the wall and rebounded, hitting Harry in the shoulder.

“Ow!” he yelled.

“What in Merlin’s name are you doing, Potter, making all this noise?” Draco had appeared in the doorway to the kitchen. His face was splotchy, his eyes red-rimmed. The sight made Harry’s heart hurt and he wondered how he could ever have been this blind. “Have you come back to yell at me more? Patronize me? Micromanage my life?” He crossed his arms and gave Harry a cold stare.

“I love you,” Harry said, helpless to stop the words.

“What?”

“I’m sorry! I didn’t _realize_ , I thought I was just being protective, but I’m jealous and I don’t want you going out with Leroy because _I_ want to go out with you!”

Draco blinked.

“Say something,” Harry begged, feeling pathetic.

“Is this…are you serious?”

“Well, yes,” said Harry.

“Oh,” Draco breathed.

“Is that good?” Harry asked.

“You complete halfwit, I gave up on hoping you’d love me back so long ago!” Draco shook his head like he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “I started trying to date other people, to try and get over you, but you kept sabotaging me like you just didn’t want me to be happy.”

“Never that. That’s the last thing I want.”

“Prove it,” Draco said with a very small smile, and Harry shot forward and kissed him breathless. They moved together, although Harry couldn’t figure out how and where, but eventually, his back hit the wall. Draco was plastered against him in the same moment, making a lovely little sighing noise.

When they separated for air, Draco’s lips moved no further than an inch away from his.

“Why now?” he asked. “What changed?” His body was crowding Harry’s, wonderful and solid and warm, and he felt so very, very perfect.

“I told some people about it,” Harry admitted. “About you. Apparently, it was... _I_ was obvious, to them.”

“Huh,” said Draco after giving him another kiss. “Some people? What people? Will this be in the Prophet come morning?”

“I don’t think so. There was this turquoise-haired Squib woman, and two old ladies who were knitting, and a Kneazle, and a goblin mom and her –” He broke off when Draco pulled away from him.

“Harry,” he said. “Harry, are you _drunk?”_

“What? No! I was on the Knight Bus.”

_“Oh,”_ said Draco. “Well, that makes a lot more sense.”

“Can we go back to the kissing?” Harry asked hopefully.

Draco smirked at him, actually _smirked,_ and then said, “If you think that after waiting for you _this fucking long,_ I plan to stop at kissing, you’re in for a very big surprise.” With that, he forced Harry’s shirt over his head and tossed it away along with the towel that Harry had forgotten he had slung across his shoulders. He felt Draco’s fingers sinking into his hair, and they kissed and kissed until Harry thought his lips might go numb.

“You idiot, Potter,” Draco said then. His hands left Harry’s hair and started working on opening his trousers. “You’re such an idiot, how could you not notice how much I want you?”

_“Harry,”_ said Harry. “Not _Potter._ That makes me feel like you’re about to jinx me in a hallway or get me in trouble.”

“Oh, you’re definitely in trouble,” Draco said, voice low and full of promise as he slid to his knees.

“Good,” Harry breathed.

“Enough trouble to last a lifetime.” Slim fingers caressed him, wrapped around him, and hot breath made him shudder.

“I’m fine with that,” said Harry. “I really –”

“Will you shut the hell up, I’m trying to suck your cock here!”

“Oh,” said Harry, and then, “Oh! _Oh!”_ And he buried his fingers in Draco’s silky hair and squeezed his eyes shut, and just before pleasure overtook him, he was flooded with thankfulness that the weather had been shit this night.

~*~

“Merlin,” Draco said much later when they were lying in bed and catching their breaths, the air cool against their sweat-slicked skin. “I am so fucking glad you came to your senses.”

“Me too,” Harry murmured and pulled him close. It felt fantastic to have Draco’s head tucked so perfectly beneath his chin, to tangle their legs lazily, sated. 

“I’ll have to write a thank-you note to whoever it was that talked sense into you.”

“Hm,” said Harry, and then, “Er, speaking of notes, there appears to be an owl at the window.”

The sound of pecking on glass started just a moment later. Draco groaned and rolled over, inelegantly getting to his knees so he could reach the window. “Who the fuck sends an owl in this weather?”

Harry couldn’t help but agree. The rain had mostly stopped by now, but it was still wet and cold and thoroughly unfriendly outside. He reached for his wand and cast several drying, cleaning and warming charms on himself and Draco, and on the bed as well because he was hopeful that there would be a good long bout of snuggling. 

Draco, meanwhile, rescued the owl from the weather, took the letter, and dug out owl treats from a drawer of his nightstand. 

“We should let it warm up,” Harry remarked. 

“Probably better,” Draco agreed, but he sounded distracted as he stared at the letter. “What the fuck?” he said then. 

“What?”

Draco handed him the letter and went to close the window, but stopped almost immediately. “Oh Merlin,” he said, “there’s another one.”

Harry read the letter in his hands and had no idea what to think. 

_To Draco,_

_This is to inform you that in the hypothetical event you being responsible for the heartbreak of one ~~Harry~~ Henry Potter, this former hitwitch will have a hypothetical bone to pick with you which may likely lead to your hypothetical untimely demise. _

_I’m sure you understand. Hypothetically, of course._

_Philomena Shufflebottom_

“Oh hell,” said Harry. “I cannot believe she did that.”

“Who in Merlin’s name is she?” Draco wanted to know as he wrangled the second bedraggled-looking owl. 

“One of the old ladies from the bus.”

“That’s one intense old lady. I won’t even ask about why she’s calling you ‘Henry’.”

“Probably best not to,” Harry agreed.

“This one’s addressed to you.” Draco handed him the second letter and allowed the owl to find a perch. 

_Dear Harry,_

_First of all, I am not calling you Henry, that is just ridiculous._

_Second of all, I believe my sister may have sent some manner of threatening owl to your Draco. Be a dear and let him know that I have had words with her and made it clear that killing or maiming him is not acceptable under any circumstances, please. Also tell him that these are not the only ways to take revenge, and I haven’t forbidden her anything else._

_All our love,_

_Ermintrude Shufflebottom_

“For fuck’s sake,” he said. 

“More threats?” 

“No…well, sort of. Ermintrude – that’s the other old lady – asked me to tell you that she won’t let her sister murder you.”

“That’s nice,” Draco said absently, and then, “Oh for fuck’s sake, there is another one. You must have really impressed these people.”

Harry shrugged awkwardly. “I’m sorry, I really am,” he said. 

Apparently, he sounded more upset than he meant to, because Draco turned around and gave him a smile. “It’s kind of sweet,” he said. “And I don’t plan on breaking your heart in any case.”

“Brilliant.”

They read the third letter together. 

_Dear “Henry”,_

_I hope this letter finds you well and, more importantly, happy. It was a pleasure to meet you and listen to your story, and I think I can speak for the others as well when I say that we ended up quite emotionally invested in your happiness. We’d love it if you decided to stop by some time to let us know what happened, and of course we would love to meet Draco as well._

_Best wishes,_

_Sky_

“That one is much better,” Draco said. 

Harry nodded, and when he spotted no more owls on the horizon, he wrapped his arms around Draco and held him tightly. “Thought you’d be more upset about having your life and wellbeing threatened, actually.” 

“I do owe them,” Draco muttered into his neck. “They made you see sense. Hmm, you’re nice and warm.”

“Well, let’s get these owls back outside and we can –”

_Fwump!_

“I don’t even have words,” Draco muttered, looking as if he didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. “This better be the last one, else I’m casting high-security anti-owl wards around this place.”

“I’d let you.” 

Draco retrieved the poor owl that had flown into the window glass and checked her over for injuries while Harry untied the letter. The parchment was heavy and gilded around the edges.

“Ready?” he asked, and when Draco nodded, they opened the letter together. 

_To One Mister Potter, The Obtuse Human Boy from The Knight Bus._

_You have by now presumably shackled yourself to this more than likely unworthy “Draco”. Despite my disappointment at your shortsighted decision which you are sure to regret, I would like to offer my congratulations. Buglirg has asked me to inform you that he is very happy for you, because he is a naïve child who understands little of the world. Both of us will eat and digest a gold nugget in celebration and hope for the unlikely event of your relationship being a successful one._

_In the event that you decide to have children, please know that Lurkrus, Brungog or Brodnaff are name choices I would consider acceptable._

_May Your Life Ever Prosper, and may "Draco" mine for you the most precious of metals and gems._

_Signed, Graglor_

Even if Harry had known what to say to this, he couldn’t have managed to because Draco was too busy doubling over with laughter. “Oh Merlin,” he howled when he finally managed to draw breath, “oh Merlin, ‘your shortsighted decision which you are sure to regret’. That’s some bona fide optimism right there.”

“I’m more concerned about her digesting a gold nugget,” Harry said with a grin. 

“She’s a Goblin, she’ll be fine. However, you failed to mention that you expect me to be mining treasures for you.”

“I’m not expecting anything, Graglor is.” 

“Fair.” Draco laid the letter aside and slid back down under the blankets. “Come warm me up.”

Harry moved to obey just as Draco continued, “She’s got you pegged though, you obtuse human boy.”

“I’m not even denying it. It took me forever to realise.” Harry pulled Draco close, back to chest, and pressed a kiss to his nape. 

“So,” Draco said, sounding sleepy and content, “Which one should we saddle our future child with? Lurkrus, Brungog, or Brodnaff?”


End file.
